From a family with one to four children

The pregnancy was spicy. At 15 weeks I already had a belly as if I was in the last trimester. Two weeks later I had to stop working because of all the physical complaints and by 24 weeks all the clothes were already washed and ready in the closet.' From 27 weeks, Mandy started having pre contractions and there was already dilation. 'During that period my partner Arie and I talked a lot. In addition to being husband and wife, we are fortunately also each other's best friends. We prepared our parents and asked friends for help. We knew now that it wouldn't take long.' With antiemetics and lots of rest, we managed to delay labor for another three weeks. "Then one of the babies turned out to be lying with its feet down, making it an emergency C-section.

Coming in to an operating room for the birth of triplets is an impressive situation, Mandy looks back. 'Each baby had its own team of 25, and there was a team for me. Once I was rushed to the OR at Erasmus Medical Center, everyone was in an uproar. Totally the opposite of the relaxed home birth I had of our son Ezra.' Once in the OR, calm prevailed. On May 2, Manoah, Tobias and Lydia came into the world crying.

After a brief meeting with their parents, the triplets must be on respiratory support and receive tube feeding. 'We wanted to do as much as possible ourselves so we got to know our little ones well and figured out what they needed,' shares Mandy. 'As early as the second day, we were hand-feeding them tube feedings. Fortunately, we were given the space to do that.'

In the following week and a half, Manoah, Tobias and Lydia were allowed to take turns in the Albert Schweitzer Hospital's high care unit, but Mandy breastfed for the first time in pairs. 'That period was very difficult. We commuted back and forth between Rotterdam and Dordrecht. With another baby at home in Halsteren, which you couldn't be with either. Heartbreaking it felt.'

In early June, the triplets were allowed to go to the hospital in Bergen op Zoom. Here, the staff has to get used to the parents who have taken so much control over the medical procedures with their children. 'Tube feeding was not a reason for us to stay in the hospital. The team was able to go along with that in confidence after consultation.' KinderThuisZorg has been instrumental in this - they provide tube placement once home on call. 'When we had just been home for three hours, Lydia had the probe out by ten o'clock at night. Sometimes we had to call three days in a row,' says Mandy. 'It was very nice to always be able to fall back on KinderThuisZorg when needed.'

Since early August, the triplets are no longer dependent on tube feeding, and support from KinderThuisZorg has stopped. Fortunately, the family is also getting a lot of help from their surroundings. Accepting help is really important. A lot of people want to hold a baby, but practical support really makes a difference. Folding laundry, cleaning the bathroom. The first weeks we got food every night from friends from our church. It was wonderful not to have to think about that in the beginning.

Now, more than six months after the birth, it is still hard work. 'There is no room to spend time alone or as partners. We are surviving. I'm still breastfeeding, which is intensive. Fortunately, I don't have to go back to work until June; I took all my parental leave right away.' Still, there are occasional moments of peace. 'When we are all together. Downstairs in the living room, fireplace lit, all four of us playing on a play mat. Then we thoroughly enjoy ourselves.

Text: Anouk Brinkman